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Healthy body, healthy mind - my struggle to regain my mental health

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    Zenchan thanks but I prefer doing my logs in a physical book as it feeds my artistic nature.


      So a few things today... a lot of them frustrated me.

      ​I haven't drawn in nearly a week, I didn't practice Japanese today even though I said I would and I ruined several pages in my Genshin book (which cost £26... I'm not a happy camper).

      I went to BJJ tonight and have decided that I'm going to compete before the year's out. I want to buy a grappling dummy from our coach so I can train techniques at home as well.

      I am implementing "how to talk to anyone technique training" which is just that I'll carry a list of the techniques I will be practicing with me and every week I'll rate my progress. Since it's weekly (and my log book is pocket size) I will have 12 weeks per section. Right now I am implementing "how to show you're a somebody" which is the first chapter of the book.

      And my Genshin book is going to be a daily planner like what I hope to get done that day and I am keeping my "mood at the end of the day" energy piece and adding a morning energy part. I have also started using my other fancy notebook for a evening journal kinda thing.


        Click image for larger version  Name:	genshin_31_4K.jpg Views:	0 Size:	435.5 KB ID:	854602So I have this thought in my head... I want to buy a Lyre harp and learn some songs. Now I thought about this all night (it is 0110) and then I thought "I'll buy the Lyre in my game and I have a load of songs I can play on it... but there's no satisfaction in it. I was thinking about learning a few songs on a Lyre IRL and seeing if I can play a few tunes in work on my days off, like a bard in Genshin or from ye olden days.

        I'm not sure as Lyres are expensive and I'm not sure if I'll want to keep it up but I love music, the only reason I gave up the harmonica is because I don't have the lung capacity to play any real songs.

        I will do some more thinking but I really want to do this (except I was the same with everything else until I got bored). Ahh why couldn't I have got into something, anything, when I was younger.


          My 30th birthday is coming and I am planning to redo my room into a Genshin impact fan room. Slime pillows (note: not actual slime), scroll posters and maybe a night light. I opted to not get a themed bed spread but I am now certain I am buying a Lyre.

          I am going to buy a new sketch book tomorrow as I have no A4 size books to take with me on trips. It's a £3 anime sketch book. I was in a horrible place earlier and nearly decided to pack it in with drawing 😨 but a little food and a hour scrolling Amazon for my Genshin merch has made me happy, I might buy a slime pillow this week just to build up the suspense.

          I have to save for the Lyre (about £60 including postage) but I hope to buy it as a birthday present to myself.

          I will also be giving £20 to £30 to mum to keep for me to go to the gym more often as I have decided to attempt a BJJ competition. It's registration day is in July but the actual comp is in October this year. I'm a little nervous as I don't have a lot of faith in my abilities but I just need to remember "you don't want to die not knowing".

          Also I asked a professional artist to review my eyes and he said they were good so although I am annoyed about my poor physique drawings I will keep it up.


            Originally posted by Aether View Post
            Ahh why couldn't I have got into something, anything, when I was younger.
            You know there's a saying.... "The best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago. The second best time is now." or something like it. It applies to learning a skill, also.


              So I am on co codimal for my back. I think I got injured doing the puppy pose (let my back relax too far into the stretch and now it hurts even when swallowing food). It's somewhere around the thoracic, maybe T1 to T3 but I am no doctor.

              Hiraelle I am getting into art (as you have probably seen in my previous posts). I am throughly enjoying it but I am not at the level I want just yet BUT I have a goal to produce a manga or comic someday. I had ambitiously said "the end of the year" but my human body is not that good. Speaking of human body drawing, breasts are surprisingly easy to draw and I feel my female physique is a 5 out of 10 but my hands are a 2.5 out of 10. My hands look like those toy claws you used to get in the 90s and I have haven't attempted feet yet. My male physique is really bad but I haven't done one in a while.

              Now for something that I noticed in the main page. Damer has the quick link to the hive been removed? It doesn't show up on my phone.

              I have come up with a plan for donating to darebee. I train BJJ and recently downloaded a technique app. So for every technique I am able to successfully learn, I will donate 50p to darebee. Now I don't train a lot (currently I train 1 day a week) because money... BUT the days I do go to the gym (for BJJ and reg fitness)my brother usually does 2 or 3 classes SO on those days I will ask to borrow a grappling dummy and do a flow I stead of lifting weights. For every successful technique I learn (and use in a live roll, I MUST use it in an actual fight for it to count) I'll donate at the end of the month but I am capping my donation a £5 a month.

              Hope you all have a fantastic day / evening / night and I'll post tomorrow.
              Last edited by Aether; May 19, 2022, 05:40 PM. Reason: Changed to a fitness donation plan


                Aether we are redesigning some aspects of the site to make them easier to find. The Hive link is now at the bottom of the home page under "Support & Community".


                  Are you studying human anatomy? I'm trying to get into drawing myself atm, mostly digital, but I still have to learn the fundamentals up front, and human anatomy is a big building block if you want to draw people, regardless of naturalistic or stylised, as anime and manga is. I feel like drawing bodies and hands actually would become easier if you know how they're constructed.


                    lofivelcro my Manga University book does show the anatomical makeup of the hands (haven't read the feet part yet) and it does show how to draw bodies but I cust can't make them look good (bear in mind I have only drawn 2 bodies so far). I'm dreading learning drawing animated bodies and poses.


                      Aether You're doing it again! One minute you're saying that you're going to buy a grappling dummy from your coach (which would probably help you towards your goal of doing well in the competition at the end of the year), the next minute you're saying that you're going to be spending money on a lyre; and the minute after that, you're telling us that you can't train much because you don't have the money. A lyre could be fun for a little while (how are you intending on learning how to play it?), but...
                      I'm not an artist but when I have drawn, I find that using a pencil is a good way to go when just roughing something out. If you use a pen, what goes on the paper is there, just like that, forever. A pencil allows you to be lighter, to sketch a line here and then another right near it but slightly different, and so on, until you get what you want. Once you're happy with what you've got, you can go over the best lines in pen. Just my thoughts.


                        TopNotch I know, unfortunately that's my nature I just can't help myself. I am buying a grappling mat from my coach and I am not buying a Lyre.

                        I was looking at digital art, lofivelcro inspired me to look at the hardware for it and it's not as expensive as I thought so I downloaded GIMP on my tablet and found a drawing pad for >£30. Digital art looks so much more realistic than pencil and it is more environmentally friendly. I'd also be travel with it easier as there'd only be the IPad and a drawing pad to fit into my backpack.


                          Don't just buy a graphic tablet if you don't know if you want to stick to drawing. I was given one, and still I don't use it and currently practise with a pencil. From what I've gathered, going digital before you've learnt the fundamentals on paper only encourages you to fudge and cover up your mistakes with the possibilities digital gives you. Also, digital art doesn't automatically looks more realistic. It depends on the artist, not on the medium. I'm also not sure about the environmental friendliness of digital. Krita's better for painting and drawing than GIMP, btw imo. You probably don't want a graphic tablet that's too small, too, so the advantage of mobility can be disregarded.

                          And most importantly: Stop wasting money on things that you find interesting without spending some time thinking about it. You have no idea how often I want to grab you by the shoulders and shake you violently to just tell you "stop for a moment and think!". I get it's your perceived nature to jump from one thing to the next, I used to be like that, too,with the exception that I didn't spend money, but you really, really should learn to focus. Look at your thread, look at your past ones, if you will. This doesn't get you anywhere. I'm already happy that you've stuck so long with drawing, I really am, but start considering what your impulse purchases will give you in the long run, aside from money you don't have.

                          -You bought things for your adventuring. When was the last time you went outside?
                          -You bought a harmonica and put it aside because of your lung capacity. Know what? Many people don't have the lung capacity for instruments like the harmonica or the flute in the beginning. That's what practice is for
                          -You bought ingredients and books for your drink mixing hobby. What happened to that?

                          I don't want to give you a bad conscience. I want you to sit down and think about what you're doing. Understand that first and foremost, you need to learn how to focus. Damn, I know it's incredibly hard, I still struggle at times, but it's one key to make progress. Spending money on a whim gives you only fleeting and momentary gratification. Look at the things you've bought in this year alone and think about how much they are of use to you now, how happy they make you now. Go from there.

                          I don't want to beat you down. Far from it. I want you to succeed in what you want to do. But first, you need to find something and focus on that, like drawing. And you need to learn to do exactly that. Focus.


                            lofivelcro I don't blame you for wanting to violently shake me, believe me that I don't like the impulse and I wish I had developed a better habit of focus earlier in my childhood but I was not treated with the same discipline as I most kids. Not to say it's my parents fault, those were the cards we were dealt.

                            I haven't bought a digital art pad, just a digital art pen. I'm quite sure I'll stick to the drawing as I love anime (as you know) and am focusing on producing a comic or manga in the future.

                            I actually want to get into digital art for 1) travelling and 2) saving money. An IPad had all the equipment I need installed and easy to carry around, less messy and cheaper in the long run. Yes there's risk I'll develop bad habits but I'll just treat it like drawing on paper.

                            As for the other stuff I've bought this year, other than the cosplay stuff that I collect they are all not in use and I am frustrated that I didn't think ahead.

                            Art is however, something I am deeply interested in (although that extends to performance arts and music as well) so I feel I will definitely not be dropping this.


                              Just because you've developed habits in your childhood doesn't mean you can't fix them now. We all aren't responsible for the cards we were dealt during our childhood, but barring serious illnesses that keep us from doing so, we are responsible for what we are doing now. That's part of being an adult: Not being a child and taking responsibility. I have to admit, I don't know if you have any conditions that keep you from doing so, so if there's something, apologies.
                              I usually don't like to tout my own problems, because they're usually not all that interesting, but like I said, I had to learn how to focus myself. That's because I have a case of hyper attention. That means my attention gets drawn away by very minor things. A speck of colour, a sound, a detail in the wood of the desk next to the book I have to read, going so far that I have trouble listening to others speak and sometimes speaking myself. It led to me failing school, because people just assumed I was a difficult child/teen, and being thrown out by my mother as a result of that. I'm telling you that, reluctantly, because I hope it can be seen as a case that obstacles can be overcome. I learnt, with a bit of help, to keep my focus, at least long enough to get things done a good part of the time. It took a lot of trial-and-error, and I still have to find out methods for things I want to do but haven't done so far in my life, like reading a book. I started doing that, learning to focus, at age 17. I'm 38 now, and I'm still fighting a battle every day anew. But it's so worth it. I wouldn't be here if I'd just accepted the cards I was dealt. Tbh,I don't even have an idea where I would be now, in that case. Not that it matters. Yes, I had help getting started. I had someone who took time to try things out with me, analyse them and refine them. It's probably much harder if you have to do it alone. At least, I could provide some insights and pointers that worked for me or haven't, but might for you. If you want. I was lucky that basically strangers decided to help me. I figure the least I can do is be that kind of stranger, too.

                              Again, if you have a severe condition that keeps you from taking responsibility for your own life, I apologise for my words. But you don't seem that way to me.


                                lofivelcro there's the possibility I have undiagnosed ADHA / ADD.