Seeking Some Duct Tape

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    That's why the handicapped bathrooms are very important in the days after leg day. Lemme tell you what, am grateful to work at a hospital. Every bathroom has the leg Doms bars for sitting down nice n easy.

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      All the stalls here at work are narrow enough
      /I'm tall enough that I just brace hands on both walls LOL. I think part of it is, by mostly doing squats and deadlifts on different days my whole leg is never sore at once. Press seems to use enough of both (bc, on squats my depth is 80-100 degrees depending on the weight/day....w press I will take it all the way to knees almost touching my chest) that everthing is beaten up. ((And w needing to stand/walk at work I think splitting my leg day like that is wise really.))

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        Some bizaro guilt/ennui/not-enoughness feeling this morning. Got the fuck out of the gym before it turned into self immolation and will avoid mirrors today. /sigh

        Active rest
        Action Hero high knees
        pullups work - was going to do propper negatives but was somehow scared, could not make myself lift feet off gaurds in top position. 3x5 scapula pulls
        dare - back kicks, ec
        Totals 21 - bc, let's kill legs as soon as they feel half better (I am down to "normal" doms today)
        Express abs lv1 to shut up "you are lazy" voice
        some really good stretches


        237 dares, 191 w ec. 450 day streak

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          Originally posted by 'rin View Post
          Some bizaro guilt/ennui/not-enoughness feeling this morning. Got the fuck out of the gym before it turned into self immolation and will avoid mirrors today. /sigh




          237 dares, 191 w ec. 450 day streak

          Ok then.

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            I am just not seeing results. My back is sore every. Fucking. Day. The weights I can pull have gone up, some, but... last summer(blue) vs now. No visible gains. Other pic was as soon as I finished dropping the weight, vs like, 18ish months now of working out (today is black t). I actually look larger... wtf.

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              So, in the the first/left pairing, it's hard for me to tell much because of the straps on your blue... er, I have no idea what that is. Sports bra, I guess?... obscure a lot of your back. Yes at your midriff, you look like you filled back out a bit, but not terribly so. In the second/right pair of pictures, the right pic, which I assume is your current one, actually appears slimmer overall to me. I think you can't see the changes because, like me, what you see isn't good enough for where you feel you are.


              [Author's note: These are purely my own opinions and are subject to the reader's interpretation.]

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                Here's what I can see objectively:
                lower traps are more developed on the right (black) as well as the lats are more developed, especially lower portions of the lats.

                So, there is some development there, but you also (for a good portion of time) have eaten more in deficit than anything so it will be harder to add mass. You got to eat to add size, there is no way around it.

                So, I think if you did a bulk/cut style of diet, you would see results faster than you are now. Yes you will add some fat, but gen you cut and burn it off. I know that would make you seeth a little bit, to add fat, but you want to keep the end result in mind. I have bulked, and really haven't cut, but over a couple years I have dropped 30#. My physique better than it was. But I ate for size and then kept the same workout plans but dropped the intake for a while and I feel good about it.

                The weight will come off. Darebee workouts won't give you bodybuilder size, especially if you have trained for a while.

                Honestly I don't know your goals. Is it add muscle? Is it just be more fit? I don't really know (your long term/lifetime plan), so all I can offer is that perspective for now.

                But your training and diet need to mesh in order for you to get what you want. You can't eat for size and do bodyweight HIIT training and expect results. Likewise, you can't eat lettuce and tomatoes and try to bodybuild. It won't work. I know you know this, but sometimes we need to just reassess what we are doing and see if we are doing what we need to be doing.

                Does that make sense. It's alot of rambling.

                Just my opinion that you didn't ask directly for but since you added the photos I thought I would give my take on it.

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                  I'm sorry you are struggling. I have no advice. I seem to have a similar struggle with seeing results. Its totally a fight!!! So you are not alone. And there is all the support and great advice you get on here to help you keep going!

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                    wjs in 2nd pics, right one is the older one... that is what is pissing me off. I feel like sisyphus.

                    aveoturbo I have bounced a bit, cal wise, mostly eating around maintenance actually. My lowest weight (grey tshit) was 160, I am abt 165-168 now. My goal is not to add size really but to get some definition... basically I want to look fit/not have ppl look shocked when I mention going to the gym. Idk why that bothers me but ppl being super fucking surprised I have a gym membership/that Im sore bc I worked out just hurts me every time. I have about a year until the point when I supposedly can't really gain muscle(40)... maybe I should do a cut first a few months so I don't freak out entirely then actually eat above maintenance purposely and see what I can manage.

                    Candace I am sorry we are paddling the same shitty canoe.

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                      Candace I am sorry we are paddling the same shitty canoe.
                      But we haven't abandoned the boat!!! That counts for so much!
                      also Idk about this 40 year old limit thing. Kate is 45 and building muscle like it's nothing. Don't worry about that.
                      I think we will get there . We just gotta dail it in and not give up.
                      But I can see muscle in your arms. So if they act shocked they are just being dumb and haven't a clue what being strong/fit/healthy means.
                      Last edited by Candace; April 14, 2018, 12:39 AM. Reason: Autocorrect put fail instead of dail!!!!!!! Ugh.

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                        I don't accept age as an excuse for you. Here is why:
                        450 Day streak

                        Ok, your ability to recover on the fly is impressive. I can't even recover that well and I supplement like a mother fucker. I think the only way I could reach the capacity you have is to get into real science: roids. I could never go there tho.

                        The age thing is merely a guideline. The avg adult will struggle more at this age, blah blah blah. Clearly you are not average. You are above average. Your genetics are in your favor, damned to whatever you think. It's just clear cut.

                        You can still clearly advance. I have no doubt. You have to let go of fears tho. In your last fitness post you were afraid to get the negatives on the pullups. You just got to do it. I get it tho. Don't think I am being mean. I feel the same way about heavy back squats and deads. But, you just have to trust yourself. Once you get them initial first reps, it's all gravy and confidence building after that.

                        This leads into my next point, be confident in you. Don't rely on other people for validation. You validate you and that's all you need. If you can't, fake it until you can. It's what I did. I forced myself to walk with swagger. I write myself notes in my paper log about how fucking awesome I did on a lift. That way I can remember it the next time because I have to refer back to see what weights/reps I did and what I should expect or try to force out in the current session.

                        Your pics show a supreme woman in the regard of fitness. You walk the walk, you have a free pass at talking the talk. All of this takes time. Like I said before, always keep in mind you end goal and set the mini goals so you can smash them along the way. Do 'rin right, you deserve it!

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                          ​​​I believe in "Age is just a number". Your body won't stop adapting on your 40th birthday. Okay, regeneration is not the same as in the twens but you can still make nice gains.
                          So forget your age and do your thing!

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                            Thank you so much aveoturbo wjs Candace Nebulus for encourgament and reality checks.

                            Nia Strength 8
                            Deadlifts 1x45x10 rdl
                            1x135x7, 1x185x2, 1x205x1!!!!!, 1x155x5, 1x135x7 + carry 20 steps lol, 1x45x10 rdl
                            Shoulder press
                            1x35x10, 1x45x5, 1x45x3, 1x35x8
                            Action hero 14 here as a break
                            Split lunge
                            3x8
                            Pullups - neutral grip negatives work w assist, fear check
                            1x55x5, 1x40x5, 1x25x3 ouch (I was, unfortunately, correct to be afraid of unassisted negatives... I totally lost control in top 1/4th of last rep and only did not wrench/hurt arm bc I let go entirly and fell.)

                            Rins remedial strength A
                            Zottmans
                            3x15x5
                            Lat raises
                            3x10x5
                            Shrugs
                            3x50x5 - try up
                            Calves
                            3x50x10 - up

                            Stretched

                            So. I need to accept that when I am stressed (like now) I WILL eat "extra". If I stop beating myself up and get smart about it, I can eat extra protein/fruits/homemade cookies for the bonus stress relief of baking instead of whole pints of ben and jerries or the doritos my husband thinks I don't know he has stashed... and do extra strength work...and maybe it wont ALL go to my belly/thighs. Im calling it "stress bulk".


                            My fittness superpower is my recovery. (Altho part of that is sheer stubbornness/willingness to be in pain. I cracked 2 ribs as a stupid teenager and only found out for sure much later in life when a chest xray showed them and dr was like "this is not in your history"... I had just wrapped myself up in ace bandages and walked across bridge to canada to get some Tylenol w codine bc I did not want to tell parents how it happened >.> ) So I may as well take advantage of this. Made 2 remedial mostly upper body sets to add into my lifting week. And, to at least not murder myself entirely, making a promise to myself to JUST do 30 mins of yoga and maybe a few extra steps 1 day a week. Prolly Wednesdays or Fridays.

                            Also, today I hit a minigoal. Real deadlift goal is 240ish for 1.5x me...but over 200 was the "fallback" goal. So, for that and for the fact that I walked the 135 across the gym to use rack to take apart when done (and only realized this was a bit of a feat when some guy was elbowing his buddy and pointing LOL) like no big deal my prize was an awesome burger for lunch.

                            237 dares, 191 w ec. 451 day streak

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                              Congrats on that deadlift - really awesome

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                                Originally posted by 'rin View Post
                                Thank you so much aveoturbo wjs Candace Nebulus for encourgament and reality checks.


                                Deadlifts 1x45x10 rdl
                                1x135x7, 1x185x2, 1x205x1!!!!!, 1x155x5, 1x135x7 + carry 20 steps lol, 1x45x10 rdl
                                Shoulder press
                                1x35x10, 1x45x5, 1x45x3, 1x35x8
                                Action hero 14 here as a break
                                Split lunge
                                3x8
                                Pullups - neutral grip negatives work w assist, fear check
                                1x55x5, 1x40x5, 1x25x3 ouch (I was, unfortunately, correct to be afraid of unassisted negatives... I totally lost control in top 1/4th of last rep and only did not wrench/hurt arm bc I let go entirly and fell.)


                                Also, today I hit a minigoal. Real deadlift goal is 240ish for 1.5x me...but over 200 was the "fallback" goal. So, for that and for the fact that I walked the 135 across the gym to use rack to take apart when done (and only realized this was a bit of a feat when some guy was elbowing his buddy and pointing LOL) like no big deal my prize was an awesome burger for lunch.

                                237 dares, 191 w ec. 451 day streak
                                No pain, no gain? I kid, dont hurt yourself, but I am so proud of you for trying!

                                Great job on deads!


                                My fitness superpower is my recovery. (Altho part of that is sheer stubbornness/willingness to be in pain. I cracked 2 ribs as a stupid teenager and only found out for sure much later in life when a chest xray showed them and dr was like "this is not in your history"... I had just wrapped myself up in ace bandages and walked across bridge to canada to get some Tylenol w codine bc I did not want to tell parents how it happened >.> ) So I may as well take advantage of this. Made 2 remedial mostly upper body sets to add into my lifting week. And, to at least not murder myself entirely, making a promise to myself to JUST do 30 mins of yoga and maybe a few extra steps 1 day a week. Prolly Wednesdays or Fridays.

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