Thank you
Anek
Mamatigerj
NancyTree
CODawn

My father is still seeing things that aren't there. But at least when he is fully awake he is cognizant that his mind is playing tricks.
This morning he told me the far wall of our living room was covered in vegetation. I told him there were no plants in that corner. He was looking at a green wall with shadows on it.
He said, "My brain is interpreting the shadows as vegetation."

He's also making more of an effort to eat today, though he still does not have an appetite.

Friday, January 29 - Rainbow's Consecutive Days of Fitness Day 282


running: 6K in 36:34 - Rondeau Rd. and Harrison Trail

push/pull/press:

50 Push-Ups Challenge - Day 11
Negative Pull-Ups Challenge - Day 11
Power Pull Challenge - Day 6
Quest for the Press - day off

Total time for push/pull/press: 3:00


Workout with my mother: Day 316

Journey Before Destination x 3 (dragon protocol)
Full Circuit - Day 3
Back Pain Relief x 2
Ankle Recovery x 2
Talk to the Hand
Hand Tendons x 2

Total time for w/o w. mother: 49:30

Total workout time: 89 minutes


Other stuff:

3.2 km hiking

Only Homemade Food - ​​ - Total Days: 395/395
No Video Games - ​ - Total Consecutive Days: 414
No Seated English Television - - Total Consecutive Days: 333
Daily French Study - - Total Consective Days: 81
GOBOT (6:30) - - 6/6
GBOT (11:00) - - 6/6


Year 51 Goals Tracking:

1. 54/1000 km running
2. 149.1/3000 km total distance
3. 42 min. / 100 hours yoga/dance
4. fastest 5K year-to-date: 28:30 (goal is < 22)
5. most push-ups in one set: 16/50 - I was shaking on the last one, but I got it done
6. press-to-handstand progress: successful "puppy press" from left leg on chair and feeling much more stable entering handstand this way than in the past (puppy press from right leg on the chair was still not quite there, which may have simply been a case of being tired by that point--usually pushing off my right leg is easier for me) (goal = 1 unassisted)
7. 1/15 chapters Bird Bio course
8. 0/100 nature journal entries with sketches
9. 14/100 complete bird counts
10. bird species IDed by ear: 5/100
11. Fluenz French: 20/150 sessions
12. French tests: TBD
13. pull-up progress: 10 second unassisted negative (goal = 1 unassisted)

It's interesting that he knows his mind is playing tricks on him. I'm glad he's trying to eat

I hope your father feels better by now!

Saturday, January 30 - Rainbow's Consecutive Days of Fitness Day 283


push/pull/press:

50 Push-Ups Challenge - Day 12
Negative Pull-Ups Challenge - Day 12
Power Pull Challenge - day off
Quest for the Press - didn't get to this. will do Sunday.

Total time for push/pull/press: 2:40


Workout with my mother: Day 317

Posture x 3
Full Circuit - Day 4
Knee Saver (with dragon adds + mods)
Sore Feet x 2
Wrist Pain
Hand Tendons x 2

Total time for w/o w. mother: 46:30

Total workout time: 49 minutes


Other stuff:

3 km hiking

Only Homemade Food - ​​ - Total Days: 396/396
No Video Games - ​ - Total Consecutive Days: 415
No Seated English Television - - Total Consecutive Days: 334
Daily French Study - - Total Consective Days: 82
GOBOT (6:30) - - 7/7
GBOT (11:00) - - 7/7


Year 51 Goals Tracking:

1. 54/1000 km running
2. 152.1/3000 km total distance
3. 42 min. / 100 hours yoga/dance
4. fastest 5K year-to-date: 28:30 (goal is < 22)
5. most push-ups in one set: 16/50
6. press-to-handstand progress: successful "puppy press" from left leg on chair and feeling much more stable entering handstand this way than in the past (puppy press from right leg on the chair was still not quite there, which may have simply been a case of being tired by that point--usually pushing off my right leg is easier for me) (goal = 1 unassisted)
7. 1/15 chapters Bird Bio course
8. 0/100 nature journal entries with sketches
9. 14/100 complete bird counts
10. bird species IDed by ear: 5/100
11. Fluenz French: 20/150 sessions
12. French tests: TBD
13. pull-up progress: 10 second unassisted negative (goal = 1 unassisted)

Belated congrats on Fireheart, Rainbow Dragon and Norma!

Sending positive vibes to your father - I hope his appetite returns soon!

Thank you
CODawn
Mianevem
Whirly

My father has been a little bit improved today, which is some relief. This is how it goes with MS. An attack ("exacerbation") can be sudden and deprive the patient of a significant amount of their former abilities. Afterward there can be a "remission" as the patient slowly regains their previous level of health. But my father's disease has largely followed a "chronic progressive" course for three and a half decades now. He deteriorates, plateaus, deteriorates, plateaus, etc. He'll be weaker than normal during an episode of some additional illness, then improve once he's recovered from the other illness. But the MS symptoms never go away.

My father's physical symptoms are severe at this point. On a good day he can still use a spoon, he can still use a computer mouse--slowly and painstakingly and with poor accuracy, but he can get the job done. On a bad day, he cannot even do these things. His cognitive skills, however, have remained at a high level. Until now. It is scary to see him hallucinating. I can only imagine what it's like for him.

My mother, for her part, is handling the situation amazingly well. My brother, on the other hand... My brother does not live here and cannot even visit now due to Covid. There is absolutely nothing at all he can do to help. Which is not something he's able to accept. So he's attempting to help by offering advice over the phone which quickly devolves into lecturing my mother and vilifying me. (I have no idea what he has actually said about me, but I am given to understand some of it was quite nasty.) My brother's baggage is the last thing any of us needs right now. But he must be scared too.

And me? Well... For more than a decade now I have been keeping a roof over my head and food in my belly by living in my parents' house and thereby enabling them to continue living in their own home. This has been my "job" throughout this time. (There were exactly zero other jobs available to me in this area even before Covid, and I couldn't possibly take on another job now in any case because the help my parents require of me takes up far too much of my time.) When I first moved in with my parents, most of what I did to help them was helping my father, and doing special things for him to improve his quality of life. These days, my mother requires more and more help as well, and most of what I am doing for my father is only what is necessary. (The extra, "quality of life" stuff, like taking him to music festivals, I don't do anymore, because his health and abilities have deteriorated to such an extent that it is far too stressful and scary for me to be responsible for him in such a setting anymore, most of the time he isn't well enough to enjoy the experiences anyway, and all the extra necessary help my parents need from me has chewed up all of the time I used to have for those extras.) This was never a job that I wanted. But it's the only job that I have. Also: my father is the only person in my family I have ever been able to count on to have my back. But I'm being selfish if I give any consideration at all to the impact my father's worsening health has on me.

I'm trying to be a better person. Trying to have grace for people whose own fears cause them to attack me. (If some people choose to think less of me because I refuse to sacrifice my own health to please them, that's on them, not me.) And trying not to whine; because I do have a roof over my head and food in my belly and excellent physical and mental health, and none of those things are likely to go away anytime soon (provided we can collectively get the Covid situation under control before things in my part of the world get much worse). Plus: I have two awesome dogs who love me unconditionally. I am doing okay.

You’re doing a fantastic job with your folks, Laura. Don’t let anyone try and dampen that. Along with all you do for them you are also taking damn good care of yourself, and that, I can tell you, can be the harder part. It sucks when an absent sibling nitpicks or speaks nasty when they are not dealing with the situation first hand. But, it sounds like you handle that with the same grace that you apply in your living circumstances. Just let it role off your back.😎

You are amazing. It's never selfish to worry about yourself and your own health.

That is good to hear, but here's a hug just in case you need it.
Also, i agree with everything Dorothy and Dawn said.

All I can say is that ever since I discovered your thread, I've been amazed by your sheer dedication to progress, to keep improving yourself -- and your parents' life.

I hope your father feels better soon. This must be a very hard situation for you, but you're handling it well. Stay strong!

I'm glad your father is feeling a little better and I hope he continues to. I'm sorry you're having to deal with your brother's baggage. It's very easy to give "advice" and opinions over the phone and nothing like the reality of actually caring for someone with that level of illness. I hope you're able to get the time you need to rest and care for yourself too.

I am sorry to hear your brother is being such an asshat. Fear/helplessness makes people do ridiculous things, sometimes, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt when you're the one their behavior is aimed at. Being a caretaker of elderly relatives, just like being a stay at home mom, is ABSOLUTELY a job and it fucking sucks that our culture doesn't respect it as such. You are doing something awesome for your family, that not everyone would be capable of/suited for.